Procrastination Station

Well, it's Tuesday again. I have a lot schoolwork due over the next two days, which means I'm busy doing something else. I don't know why I'm such a horrible procrastinator, but I can't seem to help it.

One of my favorite ways to waste time is visiting www.lileks.com. This site has a hilarious collection of old magazines and ads from the 40s, 50s, and 60s. My favorite spot is the Institute of Official Cheer. On top of the general silliness of the ads themselves, Lilek does a great job with captions and commentary. Most of the pictures and slogans on my MySpace come from there. I'm posting a ton of funny matchbooks there today. You should check it out.

I love that kind of goofy nostalgia. I'm currently collecting old ashtrays, myself. I have two really good ones: one that advertises some gun company, and another one from Holiday Inn. They're both from the 60s. In all I have four ashtrays, which is pretty impressive since I don't even know anyone who smokes.

I also have a slowly expanding collection of coffee mugs. I'm a coffee addict. My mugs are from places I've been: Sequoia National Park, New Orleans, and Gulf Shores. These aren't the only places I've visited, of course; they're just the only ones I bought mugs from. My favorite is the Gulf Shores mug -- it has a pirate on it and reads "Time flies when you're having rum!" Actually, my brother-in-law gave that one to me -- he knows me so well.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ah, it's supposed to snow a little here Thursday morning. Looks like it'll be a beautiful Thanksgiving.

Naked? Pumpkins? I'm there!

I just found out that for 9 years now Boulder, CO, has hosted a naked pumpkin run. Sometime late in October men and women doff their clothes, place carefully carved pumpkins on their heads, and race a few blocks through the city. Sounds like my kind of Halloween fun -- too bad we missed it.

You can see pictures of this year's race at: http://www.dailycamera.com/photos/galleries/2007/oct/31/9th-annual-naked-pumpkin-run/. Enjoy!

Kicin' Ass for New Orleans

So I found this comic while wanderin' around this mornin'. It's about a kid who...I dunno, I guess he gains some form of immortality just before the Civil War breaks out, and he becomes the undead guardian of New Orleans.

Image from http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/d1/Voodoo_Child_no_1.png.

Then the story jumps forward to post-Katrina New Orleans. He's kickin' ass for the Crescent City, my birthplace. That's exactly what that town needs...!

But he's part Creole, I guess, and I'm gonna have to learn a little French so I can follow it better. I can do Russian and Spanish just fine, but French has always been a little over my head. I need a tutor.

History Repeats Itself [OR] I Hope This Doesn't Give Him Any Ideas

When I heard the news this morning, I thought I'd been caught in a time warp. Check out these opening sentences from the BBC:

Pakistan's military chief has named himself the country's leader, defying international pressure to restore democratic rule after the army toppled the civilian government.

Correspondents say that although the official announcement does not say it in so many words, for practical purposes this marks the declaration of martial law in Pakistan.

The declaration of a state of emergency came in the early hours of Friday morning. At the same time, General Pervez Musharraf assumed the position of the country's chief executive.

That article is dated October 15, 1999. (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/low/south_asia/475354.stm)

Here's an article from today:

Pakistan's President Pervez Musharraf has declared emergency rule and suspended the country's constitution.

Troops have been deployed inside state-run TV and radio stations, while independent channels have gone off air.

Chief Justice Iftikhar Chaudhry, who condemned the moves, has reportedly been sacked and is being confined to the Supreme Court with 10 other judges.

It comes as the court was due to rule on the legality of Gen Musharraf's re-election victory in October

(http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7076670.stm).

Sound familiar? President Musharraf seems to be a man prone to hijacking the government whenever things aren't going his way. Our Secretary of State has been trying to prevent this move (http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD/asiapcf/11/03/pakistan.emergency/index.html?iref=newssearch); what, you can't stave it off at home, so you promote democracy vicariously through other world leaders?

Our own President Bush has noted the advantages of dictatorship: "A dictatorship would be a heck of a lot easier, there's no question about it" (http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/g/george_w_bush.html); I just hope he's not getting any ideas from this...

I am so relieved that, for the most part, our own Constitution has protected us from such abuses of power. We, too, are in a precarious state, and at times Congress and the Supreme Court are all that stand between our version of democracy and a pure dictatorship.

Congress? The current Supreme Court? Ok, now I'm getting worried...

A Lost Art [OR] The Delusional Ravings of OCD?

I was at the checkout at my local grocery store the other day, when I experienced -- again -- the horror that is...modern-day bagging. I'm pretty sure baggers used to be trained -- and even took pride in -- the art of bagging groceries (http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=7080956).

Put frozen foods together. Don't squish the bread. Don't put raw meat and produce together. For the love of God, don't put all the cans in one bag (or at least double-bag it)!

Those are just a few of the rules I thought everyone knew about bagging groceries(http://scholar.lib.vt.edu/VA-news/VA-Pilot/issues/1996/vp960410/04100412.htm). Apparently, now that the checker is also usually the bagger, this kind of logic has gone out the window.

For everyone's convenience, and in an attempt to prevent these modern-day grocery faux pas, I sort my groceries as I load them onto the conveyor belt: all my perishables are grouped together, the meat and produce are kept separate, and the bread goes on last so it won't get squished (http://www.weeno.com/art/0799/95.html). My checker either has never been grocery shopping before (quite possible, as he looked relatively young and inexperienced), or has something against me: several boxes of frozen waffles were split up and mixed in with dry pasta; one condom-thin plastic bag was packed with cans and jars of pasta sauce until it split; the soy milk was packed on its side and crushed a few containers of yogurt; and my bread got squished.

As I walked through the parking lot to my car, I thought about how this episode ranked in relation to other changes in my life. Like the fact that I drive a minivan (like a bat outta hell, baby!). Or the fact that I don't spend all my weekends getting drunk...and stuff...and I don't really have a desire to anymore. Or the fact that I'm starting to think that people ought to take personal responsibility for things, and not wait for the government to do it for them; I might even be a Libertarian. I'm going to school to be an accountant. I don't like most new music, I don't follow the latest Hollywood Whorer stories (yes, I meant to do that), and I despise "reality" television. I think we ought to spend more resources on protecting the unborn citizens of our country, rather than on those folks who come here illegally. My hand gets a weird cramp-like feeling when I pick things up lately, and my joints (especially my knees) get really stiff when I sit too long -- I hope it's not arthritis. Thirteen year old girls show more cleavage than I do, and I'm tired of guys staring at my boobs or my ass: look a little higher -- I've got a whole lot more to offer up here!

I think I'm getting old. Or conservative. I'm not sure which is worse.